Brushing Off

Growing up in the small rural community that is Tonganoxie, Kansas I lived on a dirt road. Now before you let your minds wander, yes, it was out in the country. But no, I was not a hillbilly. I had chickens, cows, tractors, hay bales, the whole nine yards, yet at the same time I also hate country music and find it a bit degenerating to the human mind to watch NASCA. Sorry for the sophisticating tangent I just went on there.

Part of having a dirt road meant that you would turn up dust clouds when you’d drive; those dust clouds would fall back down onto anything in its path. Cars start to collect a sheath of earth on their bodies and if you didn’t wash them, they would begin to look like dirt huts straight out of Zambia.

In high school, I began to build an appetite for running and because of this I quickly found out that when you would go for a jog on my road you would get covered in dust when cars would pass by. So every time I’d find myself walking up my driveway after a strenuous run I’d be dusted. Of course it was all relative to the traffic on that particular day but you could at least expect some amount of dirt and grime. As to not aggravate my parents I would brush myself off before coming in the house.

I recently came across a story in the book of Matthew that always makes me think of these dirt road runs. It’s a passage in chapter 10, where Jesus sends out his disciples into the towns around the surrounding Judean countryside, telling them to reveal the eternal truth at hand. Jesus commanded to go to the lost and proclaim to them that, “The kingdom of heaven is at hand” (vs. 7). Jesus knew that his disciples had heard enough of his teachings; it was now time for action. “You received without pay, now give without pay.” Jesus had been through a lot with these men, and he knew that they were plenty well equipped to do his assignment.

Although Jesus knew that they were ready for the job, He forewarned them about one more thing in Matthew 10:14. “And if anyone will not receive you or listen to your words, shake off the dust from your feet when you leave that house or town.” Jesus stated it pretty simply, brush yourself off and basically don’t let those times when people will not accept you and heavenly things deter you. You have to move on from these things. He went on explaining how sometimes they would even react negatively to your proclamation. How sometimes denial will turn into rejection, rejection into lashing out, lashing out into persecution.

“Behold, I am sending you out as sheep in the midst of wolves, so be wise as serpents and innocent as doves. Beware of men, for they will deliver you over to courts and flog you in their synagogues, and you will be dragged before governors and kings for my sake, to bear witness before them and the Gentiles. When they deliver you over, do not be anxious how you are to speak or what you are to say, for what you are to say will be given to you in that hour. For it is not you who speak, but the Spirit of your Father speaking through you. Brother will deliver brother over to death, and the father his child, and children will rise against parents and have them put to death, and you will be hated by all for my name's sake. But the one who endures to the end will be saved. (Matthew 10:16-22)

I was able to get to know a kid named Andrew at camp this summer. He reminded me in a lot of ways the character Alfalfa from The Little Rascals. He has a small frame and compliments it with an innocent, baby face. He was a new high schooler meaning he was barely older than the age of 13, his birthday a few days prior to camp. He opposed every stereotype of the silent incoming freshman. Andrew had no trouble walking up to a group of kids or adults and getting to know them. His jokes were immature yet suited his demeanor, making him an enjoyment to be around. I found myself being around Andrew more and more throughout the week, I sat in his group lessons and their reflection times after night sessions. The more I was able to see this kid I started to understand that he had a budding faith and desire for God in his life.  

On the last night of camp the whole youth met up to wrap up the day and talk about what had transpired. Most of the kids who opened up talked a great deal about how they need to be more committed to their relationship with Christ.

Surprisingly Andrew stood up, ready with something to say. For as much as he is the center of attention, it definitely seemed like he had trouble in front of a crowd. “This has been an awesome time for me at camp, I’ve learned so much and now I want to change some things in my life. One thing I have been really challenged to is to forgive, to forgive those who have done bad things to me and to say sorry to those who I have done wrong to. I love this youth group for being here for me as I figure this out and being there to embrace who I am.”

The kids in the room clapped for him; it appeared as though not everyone was aware of the drastic story about to be told.

“One person who I’ve needed to forgive for a long time now is my dad.”

The room grows quiet; whispers are suppressed and the distracted are brought to attention. Andrew’s words begin to slip here and there, “My dad was never one that had a positive influence in my life, in fact he was much more the opposite. He separated from my mom a long time ago and treated her badly. I felt like he treated me worse. He would emotionally abuse me; he never made me feel like I could do anything and always called me terrible names. On top of that he would physically beat me, hurting me any time that his drinking got out of control, which was a lot. He forced me to drink when I was 7 years old. My father always made me feel worthless.”

He takes a deep breath. “About year ago he called me and told me to never talk to him again, saying that he didn’t want me in his life and it’s better without me.”

Andrew pauses as he gets a little choked up. As he recovers he says: “I realized through this week that I needed to call and forgive my dad, I need to let him know that I don’t hold this against him because Jesus doesn’t hold things against him. God wants my dad to be forgiven just like I am, and so I called. Last night I went and called my dad and told him that even though he hurt me I was not going to hold those things against him.”

“Behold, I am sending you out as sheep in the midst of wolves…”

Andrew furiously fights to get collected. You can tell that he was only moments away from an uncontrollable sobbing if he didn’t gather himself. The whole room is silently fixated to this every word.

“And then my dad spat in my face.”

Tears stream down this little boys face as he recounts the painful memories of this wounding phone call from just hours before.

“My dad told me to never call me his son again. He yelled at me for calling him and wanted to never think about me again. He ended with telling me he wished I was never born and hung up before I could say anything.”

“Brother will deliver brother over to death, and the father his child, and children will rise against parents and have them put to death.”

You know sometimes I don’t think that we truly realize how easily we can let the dust of our past rejections or dismissals stick on us. Sometimes it’s caked on, and it would take a lot of effort to separate from it. Other times we just don’t want to even think about it. Maybe we are scared; scared that when we clean ourselves off we are admitting defeat and walking away the loser. If we are to clean ourselves off we become bare or naked to the fact that we did not succeed. A lot of times though we want to keep those rejections pent up, we don’t want to let it go because it hurt us in some way. It’s a very common mentality to have that if we are hurt, we should make an effort to reinflict pain back. The Bible phrases this “Eye for an eye." Yet Jesus' radical message seems that true justice is when you to let go of the past and and compares it to brushing dust off of your pants.

Andrew finished with this before taking a seat, “I’m ok. I know that God has me where he wants me and not even my own dad is not going to stop me from being where Jesus calls me to be.”

Now if I was to meet Andrew’s dad today I’d have some choice words to say to him. But after listening to his heart I think I can easily assume that if Andrew had the opportunity to say something to his father, the words would be more forgiving and less stinging than mine. I don’t know a lot of people that would argue with Andrew if he decided to hold a lifelong grudge against his dad. But that was not Andrew’s reaction. And that's what caught me off guard, and I was able to see this passage of scripture in a whole new light.

You see Andrew realized in that week of camp what Jesus was truly teaching, a life of unconditional love, hurts. Jesus realizes the pain that we can go through sometimes when we follow his teachings, because he too is pained when he is rejected. Jesus dealt with rejection his whole life! Peter in Acts 4 goes as far to say that,“This Jesus is the stone that was rejected by you, the builders, which has become the cornerstone." When we persevere through these trials we are able to see true love. For as much pain Andrew’s dad has caused his own son, do you know that God loves him all the same? It’s because of God’s love that we are forgiven of our brokenness.

If Jesus did not forgive the people who rejected him and displayed radical grace, then we would have no chance. Jesus brings the same love and grace to us as he does to everyone else, no matter what we’ve done.

And if we held these things against others we begin to corrupt ourselves. When we taint ourselves in this way our image begins to look less God-like, and when we look less God-like then people don’t find weight in our words. Who are we to reveal God’s love to people when we can’t show that same love?

I think back to all those times of when I’d brush myself off after a run. You know if I never brushed off it’d be hard to keep the inside of my house clean. How hard would it be to clean a house when you’re covered in dust? As I would vacuum I would track dirt behind me with every step, leaving footprints in the newly cleaned carpet, anything I’d rub up against would get dusty, and any rag I would touch would be soiled before they even got to the counters. When you brush yourself off you are leaving the stained past behind you, and putting the ability to cleanse before you. 

In your life you are going to get dirtied up. Remember to brush yourself off.

This post is a guest post by a good friend and brother, Ben Myers. He is working with kids in Las Vegas this summer and wanted to share this story of radical grace and redemption with me and anyone who wants to be inspired. Follow him on Twitter at @thebenmyers.